1) Joke:Â What is an accountant?
Someone who solves a problem you didn’t know you had in a way you don’t understand at a price you can’t afford.
2) Joke:Â What is the definition of an introverted accountant?
Someone who stares at their shoes when talking to you.
3) Joke:Â What is the definition of an extroverted accountant?
Someone who stares at YOUR shoes when talking to you.
4) Joke:Â There are 3 types of accountant
Those who can count and those who can’t.
5) Joke:Â What’s a shy and retiring accountant?
One that’s half-a-million shy and that’s why he’s retiring.
6) Joke:Â Did you hear about the constipated CFO?
He couldn’t budget with his calculator so he had to work it out with a pencil and paper.
7) Joke:Â What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet?
Lost.
8) Joke:Â What do you call an accountant without a calculator?
Lonely.
9) Joke:Â What do accountants do to liven up their office party ?
Invite a Funeral Director.
10)Joke:Â How was copper wire invented?
2 accountants were arguing over a penny.
11) Joke:Â How does an accountant trash his/her hotel room?
By refusing to fill in the Guest Comment Card.
12) Joke:Â Why do accountants get excited at the weekends?
Because they can wear causal clothes to work.
13) Joke:Â How do accountants make a bold fashion statement?
Wear their dark grey socks instead of the light grey.
14) Joke:Â What does an accountant’s husband ask his wife when he can’t get to sleep?
“Tell me about your day, dear.”
15) Joke:Â A woman went to the doctor who told her she only had 6 months to live.
“Oh my God!” said the woman. “What shall I do?”
“Marry an accountant,” suggested the doctor.
“Why?” asked the woman. “Will that make me live longer?”
“No,” replied the doctor. “But it will SEEM longer.”
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By Amit B
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